17 years!

My very first client was a dear friend, so every year around this time I have a reminder of my first birth when she posts photographs of her daughter’s birthday celebrations. This year she drove off in their car. Today is my son’s birthday, marking 7 years since I was last pregnant. I want to thank all the families who have invited me into their lives.  I feel blessed to have been part of your family’s birth story.

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To celebrate these milestones I’m making some changes in my pricing, something I haven’t done in several years.

My best deal remains the Best Birth package, for those who just want support during labour.  This is a good choice for parents who have family close by to help in the postpartum days, or for people who have taken childbirth ed classes and are feeling pretty confident about their birth choices, or for families who are having their second child.

Package includes 1 prenatal planning session, labour and 2 hours after birth, newly born photography and 1 postnatal visit in the first week. Also includes unlimited texts and emails until 17 weeks.  $870 +HST

The Ultimate Birth Support Package is the Birth and Beyond package, for those who want education as well as labour support. Ideal for busy couples who can’t make it to prenatal class, or for those who are feeling anxious and need more personalized support. This is a good choice for couples who don’t have extended family nearby to help them in the first few weeks.  If your family are coming immediately after the birth you can book your postnatal visits for the time after they go when you may be feeling vulnerable without them. It’s also helpful to book your doula for after your partner returns to work.

This package includes 2 prenatal planning visits, labour and 2 hours after birth, newly born photography and  4 postnatal visits. Also includes unlimited email and text questions for the first 17 weeks. $1177 + HST

If you feel you  have a handle on the labour and birth part but just want additional support when your baby comes home, the Best Start Package is for you. You can pre-book your doula ahead of time to support you when you need it.  This package is also a really good gift to give an expectant family at a baby shower. Booking in advance saves you $40.

17 hours of postpartum visits, minimum 3 hour calls.  First visit in the first week. Unlimited emails and texts for 17 weeks. $387 + HST
Postpartum hours can also be booked more casually. $25/hr + HST, minimum 3 hour call.

For a free consult please click here!

I will be your calming goat.

I just watched Ferdinand with my kids and I just love the character of Lupe. She’s so fun and enthusiastic and a bit vulgar and I’m not going lie, I enjoy that. Being a city girl I didn’t realize that it is common practice to put goats in with the bulls and horses to keep them calm, and I has the realization that goats are basically doulas for expensive livestock. Keeping their anxiety at bay makes it easier to manage the prize race horses or fighting bulls. In pregnancy women quite rightly feel anxious and nervous about the birth to come and hiring a doula can help you feel better about your ability to handle labour.

calming goat

The statistics are clear – just the presence of a calm, confident third party in the birthing room decreases the use of medical interventions and improves satisfaction with the birthing experience, even if all they do is sit there.  What I bring to the birthing room is my belief that birth works. I bring my confidence that you can do this, like so many women have done before. I bring experience of other births, my own included, so I feel comfortable with your movements and vocalizations and nothing phases me. My surety that everything is going to be alright is contagious and it helps relax you and your partner so that you can concentrate on birthing your baby calmly and with confidence.

I will be your calming goat. Keep labouring on and you will get your prize – a beautiful baby.

Click here to book a free consultation.

 

 

Happy Birthday, Baby Girl

Nine years ago my daughter was born, and my life changed forever.

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This journey I’m on now started long before her birth, my obsession with babies started young and I was a seasoned baby whisperer long before I had my own baby, I was a doula before I got pregnant myself.  I was ready to be a mother, ready to experience birth. I was eager for it.

This time nine years ago I was on my hands and knees in a rented birthing tub in my spare room, soon to be the baby’s room. My mother poured water on my lower back with each contraction. My midwives watched from the hallway. My mother wore the apron she usually wore for doing the washing up.  I remember my cat curled up on the stairs, not wanting to get too close to the action but not wanting to leave either. I remember my friend arriving, rather late in the action, and calling to her that she should come up. She was wearing white, perhaps not the best choice when called to a birth but I think it worked out for her and I’m so glad she came.

When you are in labour time works differently. I was in labour for 17 hours, birthing in the late afternoon at 4:36pm. I feel like I was in the tub for most of that time, the tub was magical, but my midwives notes say differently. I thought I pushed for maybe an hour, but apparently I pushed for nearly 4! I remember pushing in the tub and not liking it, trying the birthing stool and then side lying in the bed. My baby was stubbornly OP, meaning she was facing front ways instead of back, and despite all the pushing she didn’t seem to want to come out. I remember the moment when she decided she would be born today after all, feeling her corkscrew from front to back and then it was all a flurry of movement and panting and “don’t push!” and then she cried and I felt so relieved it was over…. and then one of the midwives said “push for the shoulders!” and I thought, how could she not be born yet – I can hear her – and then she really was born and it really was over and I was so tired and she was so small.

And I was different. I was a Mother.

Thank you for making me a Mother, baby girl. I love you today and always.

 

If you want to know more about doula care, click here!

If you want to book a consultation, click here!

 

Five things to register for that no one will ever buy you.

5 things to register for

It’s a little known fact that many department stores will let you complete your registry at a discount, so go ahead and register for these five things that you will really need but that no one will want to buy for you.

#1 – A Squatty Potty – any step stool will do but this one is specifically designed to hug your toilet and when used it puts you into a perfect squat position. The toilet wasn’t really designed very well, and this little stool puts your body into a much better position for emptying your bowels. If you are suffering from constipation during your pregnancy this will really help stuff slide right out. Also, squatting frequently helps stretch and strengthen the pelvic floor, which will result in an easier childbirth. You can even use this when you are labouring at home to support you in a squat position and help the baby move down and out.

#2 – A donut pillow. Not a very glamorous gift but since even the most uneventful birth will result in some swelling and discomfort in your vagina, a donut pillow gives you somewhere to sit where you will not have to deal with any pressure on your delicate parts. Put an ice pack or a bag of frozen peas in the hollow and relax. These are also great in late pregnancy to take the pressure off your tailbone and pelvic floor and help you remember to sit up straight in your office chair.

#3 – Maxi-pads you can see from space. No one is going to buy you these, but if your department store has a drugstore section, why not? You will need these even if you have a C-section as it’s normal to bleed for several weeks after having a baby, and you can’t use tampons or a cup at this time (which for me, was the worse part of bleeding for several weeks). Always Maxi Overnight with wings get my vote. They are enormous but do the job well. Some women like to wear Poise or Depends in the first few days but personally I didn’t enjoy the feeling of wearing a diaper, and I found a product designed to absorb blood rather than urine just did a better job at handling the lochia. Register for a bottle of witch hazel too and prep some padsicles to enjoy in your first few days postpartum.

#4 – A sitz bath. This little insert for your toilet will be your best friend if you suffer from postpartum hemorrhoids. Fill it with warm water and Epsom salts and sit (well, squat since you have a squatty potty) with a magazine for a blissful ten minute break. Helps heal your perineum and gives you a well deserved time out. A good opportunity for your partner to figure out how to handle a new baby while you take care of yourself. Self-care is a vital part of surviving new parenthood, find little moments of solitude wherever you can.  Your days of using the bathroom alone are numbered.

#5 – A waterproof mattress pad. While most women don’t have their water break spectacularly like you see on TV, it does happen and you need to protect your mattress just in case. It’s more likely that you will leak milk or your newborn’s diaper will fail when you are lying in bed together. Register for that mattress pad- those suckers can be expensive but not as expensive as a new mattress.

Baby Ready can help you set up your registry with the things you really need. Contact us here for a free consultation!

Gift the gift of a doula!

Gift of doula

Some partners are concerned that having a doula will mean they will have no role in their baby’s birth. This is not true! A doula can help give you the confidence to be a fantastic supportive birth partner. Your doula can reassure you that your partner’s labour is progressing normally and help keep you both calm if it is not. Your doula can teach you comfort techniques that will your partner will come to depend on during her labour. You will be as involved as you want to be for the entire labour and delivery. And if you need to step out, you can feel confident that your partner is being taken care of in your absence. Give the gift of doula support – and get it for yourself too.

 

Don’t be a martyr, you’re a mother now!

It’s really hard, after a lifetime of pretending everything’s fine when it’s really not fine, to stand up and advocate for yourself. I understand that. Women are socialized from birth to be polite and nice and do as we’re told. I’m trying hard to raise my daughter to question this. I want my kid to ask questions, get the information she needs and do what she believes to be right without concerning herself with being nice, whatever that means. When we’re pregnant there’s a lot going on in our bodies that feels different and new and even strange, and you will have things come up that you need help understanding. If you feel like you’re bothering your obstetrician or midwife with your endless questions and concerns, then perhaps you have the wrong caregiver. Helping you understand what’s going on in your body and mind is their job. As your doula I can help answer some of your questions and concerns, but I am not a medical professional and I want you to go over my head and feel comfortable doing so – your doula, your doctor (or midwife) and your partner should work as a team and not get in each other’s way. Pregnancy is not an illness and while you may feel uncomfortable you shouldn’t be suffering. If you are in pain, if you feel sick all the time, if you spike a fever these are potentially signs of preterm labour and you must contact your caregiver right away.

Check my handy postcard size hand out for the warning signs that you should not ignore.

3rd Trimester Discomforts

Hire a doula to help you plan your pregnancy, birth and postpartum recovery!

 

click here to contact us!

The Uncomfortable Feminist

 

I am a birth worker,

arguably the most woman-centric job on the planet. I work with women at their most vulnerable, most powerful, most female. Giving life is something only we can do. It is beyond awesome. And yet, women in childbirth are subjected to disrespect, abuse, and downright misogyny on a daily basis. I am confused by the number of hospital staff I have encountered on the maternity floor who do not seem to like working with women. Perhaps a career move should be considered?

As a doula it is my job to support my client. It is not my job to speak for my client, and sometimes I have to sit and listen and hold my tongue while others try to knock my client down. As a doula I have no power, but I try to make my client feel powerful, powerful enough to stand their ground and say “I’m doing this my way” when faced with pressure from those who feel the need to run the show. Sometimes I feel very uncomfortable.

As a doula I am a witness to a lot of underhanded stuff.

As a feminist I want to scream. “Don’t talk to her that way!” “She is an adult not a child!” “You are her doctor not her boss!” I want to say, “He’s not right.” “He doesn’t have the right” “She’s impatient; her agenda is not the same as yours.” I want to say “a healthy baby is not the only important thing. “  I will be misunderstood. A healthy baby is important -but what about a happy and healthy mother? What about an empowering birth experience?

What about respecting the woman as well as the child?

I am a birth worker, and a feminist.  But I rely on my husband’s income to support our family. If giving birth is not respected, how can I expect birth work to be respected either? I believe in the work I do, but my belief doesn’t put much food on our table.  I am told to charge what I’m worth, but if the birth experience is not respected, the worth of a doula is not clear.

I am a doula and a feminist.

I love my work. I do it because I believe choice in childbirth is a feminist issue. I never wanted to be political, but I will fight for this. We were all born. How can we not respect the one thing that we all have in common?

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